Perpetrating from the Victim Place is a Thing, and It's Not OK
Anastasia (Staci) Sprout
I feel angry that there has been no effective accountability for the harmful behavior of Nicole Prause towards her online and legal stalking, bullying, and harassment victims. The only way I got her to stop this behavior towards me is by withdrawing from almost all public efforts to educate people about the potentially harmful effects of pornography on developing minds and sexuality. A year ago I quit posting on Facebook. I stopped almost all twitter posts. I have limited public appearances and media interviews, despite multiple requests. I have not published another book. In short, I have gone into hiding as a public educator, and I feel sad about this - but it was necessary for my health and well-being. As any victim of bullying can tell you - sometimes it’s just about survival and getting by.
Today, I need to speak out about the fact that though I’ve escaped her relentless toxic attention, Prause has continued to harass, bully and intimidate many others who simply try to spread factual information about the potentially harmful or addictive nature of pornography. What is that?
Due to investigative explorations, her criminal record and mug shot were uncovered from a past arrest of Prause for behaviors similar to those she remains engaged in - she was found guilty of Domestic Violence, Violation of a Protection Order against her. These days she’s doing her harassment online and through malicious, bogus legal actions rather than in person. Her perpetration of others is to claim they have attacked or harmed her. In psychological terms, we call this “Perpetrating from the Victim Place” and it is not OK. The more common descriptor of his behavior is DARVO.
"DARVO" is a specific form of gaslighting, or relational abuse, that is often associated with betrayal. The acronym stands for "Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim - Offender." - Dan Drake
Yeah, I’m done with the Prause DARVO. She’s the offender, period. She’s been doing this for a long time. She has hurt many, many people. She needs to stop this behavior, but she’s been unable to do so, despite legal action.
AT THE VERY LEAST, SHE NEEDS TO STOP BEING HELD UP AS AN EXPERT IN ANYTHING RELATED TO INTIMACY AND SEXUALITY. ANY MEDIA OUTLET THAT DOES NOT LOOK INTO HER BACKGROUND WILL BE DIRECTED TO THIS PAGE AND A GREAT DEAL MORE INFORMATION THAT HAS BEEN UNCOVERED ABOUT HER BACKGROUND, HER TIES TO THE PORN INDUSTRY, AND THE EXTENSIVE LIST OF HER VICTIMS.
START AT THE QUOTE AND LINK BELOW. YOU CAN READ MY STORY IN PREVIOUS ENTRIES OF THIS BLOG.
ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.